Psst... God, when will this sale end? The stock markets must have a board that informs us about the last date of the sale.
Alright, let’s assume that it won’t result in fires (it’s hypothetical in any case). So petrol prices will see an all-time low! More car sales will be obvious. And then we’d be able to afford bigger cars or funkier bikes. Ha ha… Nano… ta ta! Perhaps the markets will boom. And so will the subzi markets! The vegetable vendors won’t be able to increase prices by blaming it on expensive transportation. We all will be sheikhs! No Mrinal, not more than 1 wife for you! People might work for another better cause – petrol harvesting (why is it not possible in the real world?).
Considering that wherever possible, petrol would take water’s place, we might have some new products like petrol purifiers, petrol-proof watches, petrol-proof lipsticks and petrol-proof paints!
Bollywood! Yeah, here are some handy tips for the remix baadshahs:
- Thanda thanda petrol…
- Barso re petrol…
- Petrol kaa bahaanaa hai, zaraa der lagegi…
But then, since the roads would be layered with petrol, most of us would be able to reach work skating, wearing our normal shoes! No more conveyance allowance. Hairstyles? Well, we all would look champu with the same sticky flat hairstyle but only with varied lengths! Brylcreem would have to come up with an innovative product here. Petrol pumps won’t be required that much, so perhaps we’d have shower pumps. Like, “Hello! Are you walking into your office all drenched up in petrol? Take a shower with our water-based body wash in our special shower room and look drier and smarter!”
Oh, the petrol price hike is turning me insane. Was I typing in my sleep? Damn, someone do something about the petrol prices. It’s driving all of us crazy. I’ll go get a glass of petrol now.
P.S. Beta and Mrinal reminded me of writing something on rains. Varsha reminds me of rains all through the year. I dedicate this post to them.
By the way, if you ever see someone fainting or feeling sick or someone who just met with an accident, in your train or on the road or just anywhere, for God sake don't simply think, "He'll be fine" and walk away. I urge you to raise an alarm or do whatever you can do to help without wasting a single second. Last night, perhaps a woman could have been saved if people around her had come to her help before it was too late.
We talk about the spirit of Mumbai all the time... when some people saw a woman in a train last night and she was just not well, I hear they simply went and sat somewhere away from her. I heard she got in the train at Elphinstone Road and it was only at Andheri that some nice people, as soon as they came to know about it, pressed the panic button and helped her out. And I must tell you, thanks to the men who got in the ladies compartment when it became general compartment at night (and of course also a few nice ladies) at least some effort was made. What happened to the others who were watching her since Elphinstone Road? For those who ignored her... she is no longer with us, may be she could have been saved. Let's be nice people, we are humans with a heart and soul, right?
Mathematics suggest that this is the best government could have done. Apparently this is the least possible burden on the consumers. However, this will impact the inflation to increase to 8.4% vs 8.1%.
Meanwhile, Left has called for national stir againt the price hike.
Tired of visiting doctors and spending my peanuts... oops salary... on the medical bills, I've decided to eat 1 apple every day. I hope I soon become healthier and sing, "An apple a day keeps the doctor and his bills away"!
And while Chennai Super Kings and Rajasthan Royals play against each other today, here are a few terms I think are common to cricket and the female counterparts (we) of cricket fans (them, they... whatever):
Block: We are blocked from their sight as long as they are glued to the television or the scores on the internet
Bowled / Out: Our state - out of the field
Leg before wicket: Sure, even our legs before the wicket on the television won't distract them
Bye: An extra, sure the role we play during cricket matches ;)
Glance: Something we might not get even after screaming our throats out
Golden pair: Him and the television
Century: The time it appears to be during a match
Innings: Actually there are four innings, two during the match, then one is the game they play with us to avoid any time together and then the last inning is in out control - taking their case
Leg break: What we feel like doing
Limited overs match: I don't think it exists, all the matches seem to take forever
Partnership: Partnership? Partners? Where? Who?
Man of the match: I think it should be 'my man' in the match